It’s hard to keep up with him! ?

Hello, it's Iruru.

The other day, when I was talking about love with my friends,、I heard someone say, ``I ended up agreeing to him, and things got so bad that I broke up with him.''

 

There was a time when I was quite tired of trying to accommodate other people, so I was wondering if you could understand, so I was asking, what do you all think?

I already broke up with him and want to get back together! I think there are people reading this article, but today I would like to ask you a little bit about how your relationship with him was when you were dating. Please try to remember that ♡

It doesn't mean you have to conform to him.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Some people have the desire to do something special for the person they love!

I think that's a wonderful thing. When both people are busy, someone may need to make adjustments.

However, if you find yourself in this situation and feel like you're saying, "I feel a bit uneasy, this is tough," take a moment to pause.

Are you doing something you don't really want to do? Perhaps that unease is a message from yourself saying, "Take better care of yourself!"

When you are too much in tune with him, it's more about him than you!

When I felt overwhelmed by accommodating him too much, I would put aside my own desires and what I wanted to prioritize for myself. It became all about him, him, him.

Once I started down that path, even if I didn't actually want to accommodate him,

And I would become anxious, thinking I had to accommodate him, even when I didn't want to. But the truth was, I didn't want to do it.

Also, because I was constantly enduring things, I sometimes fell into a victim mentality, thinking, "I'm enduring so much, so he should do at least this much!"

But in my case, he had never asked me to accommodate him. I was accommodating him on my own. Yet, I would push it onto him as if I were imposing, saying, "I'm the one who's always enduring!" This only made our relationship worse.

Now, looking back, I realize that what I was telling him was actually what I wanted to say to myself.

In my case, the underlying unease I felt was like a sign telling me, "Take better care of yourself! Love yourself more!" It's what we often refer to as "self-love."

Just do it because you want to do it, in the way you want to be.

Manifesting desires through the subconscious mind follows the principle of "what you believe, you become." Once you've decided on your desired outcome, the key is to simply embody that outcome as if it has already come true.

Being considerate and accommodating to others can be considered virtues in society, but the important question to ask is, "Do I genuinely want to do these things as the version of myself that has already realized my desires?

If the answer is yes, then you do them without expecting anything in return. This way, I no longer engage in forced considerations.

In practice, I began to take care not to do things I didn't want to do and not to suppress what I truly wanted to do. I realized that this was an act of self-love. However, I haven't made any drastic changes.

I simply do things that align with the version of myself that feels fulfilled and joyful. Looking back, I used to be quite pushy and often insisted, I did this for you, so you should do that for me.

Now, if I feel like I might become pushy, I refrain from doing so and avoid having expectations. I just focus on doing what I genuinely want to do.

This change has made my heart feel significantly lighter.Accommodating your partner is a wonderful thing, but if you ever find it a bit challenging, I hope you find this perspective helpful.