【073】When I Gave Up on Reconciling with My Ex Who I Didn’t Trust, My Ideal Partner Appeared

“Part of me wants to get back together. But I just can’t forgive him.”

Have you ever found yourself holding two conflicting feelings at the same time? You can’t let them go because you love them, yet the memories of being hurt won’t disappear. If you’ve been carrying that confusion for months, today I’m sharing M’s love manifestation success story with you.

M’s Situation: Hoping for Reconciliation While Harboring Distrust

M is in her 30s. She started dating a man she met through an online game in March 2020.

But soon after they began dating, discomfort began to pile up. Being called by another woman’s name, hearing “it’s fine, I’ll invite someone else,” learning that “I dated you because you were easy” — the list went on.

Even after they broke up in September that year, when he said “let’s try again,” M continued to stay connected through gaming, slowly trying to close the distance between them. But then she began noticing signs of another woman, and eventually discovered that he had gotten married and had a child.

“I hate this. I’m so sad. Why hasn’t he even apologized once?”

While holding onto these dark feelings, M kept telling herself “I want to get back together because I love him.” This was the most painful period of her life.

The Subconscious Mind and “Ego”

Let me briefly explain the key concepts of ほめ♡レン.

The subconscious mind is the deep part of our heart that we’re not usually conscious of. ほめ♡レン is based on the idea that “what you think becomes your reality.”

Ego is the semi-automatic reaction we have to events. It’s like when “no contact means it’s over” or “he got married means it’s finished”—our hearts react based on past experiences and fixed beliefs. ほめ♡レン sees this as separate from our true feelings.

M was trying to decide on “being lovey-dovey with him,” but her ego (the feelings she couldn’t forgive, her frustration, her distrust) was in the way.

When She Realized “He Doesn’t Have to Be the One”

When M learned that he’d had a child, her feelings hit a breaking point. She sent a consultation email to ほめ♡レン.

As she wrote the email, M had a clear realization:

“I can’t picture being lovey-dovey with him. There’s a part of me that can’t forgive him. Even if we did get back together, the fact that he two-timed me and married someone else would always bother me.”

Iruru’s response said this:

“I’d like you to first forgive yourself for all the feelings coming up about him. Whichever feelings you choose, I hope it results in a choice that truly takes care of you.”

M read those words over and over, and she thought:

“I want to make myself happy. When I’m thinking about him, I’m not happy.”

A few months after the consultation, M made a decision:

“It doesn’t have to be him. I want to be me—cherished deeply by someone I love.”

A Man Who Checked Every Box on Her Ideal Partner List Appeared

Now that her feelings had shifted, M excitedly wrote out her ideal partner list.

A scrunched-up smile when he laughs, a nice voice, loves to give lots of hugs, tells her she’s cute every day, shows his love both in words and actions, calm and peaceful to be around, absolutely adores her—she wrote it all down.

Around the time M shifted her thinking to “being deeply adored by someone I love,” she met her current boyfriend through friends at a gaming meetup. He was ten years younger than her.

Even when she initially declined, he said “please think about it again after we get to know each other little by little,” and he waited patiently for her. He built trust with her slowly, without any pressure at all.

When M could genuinely think “he’s the one for me,” they started dating with marriage in mind.

“Every day I’m overwhelmed with ‘I love you’ and ‘you’re so cute’ from him, and I feel his love constantly.”

Almost everything on her ideal partner list had come true.

Conclusion: Thoughts Come First, Reality Follows

ほめ♡レン values the principle that “thoughts come first, reality follows.”

The moment M decided “it doesn’t have to be him. I want to be adored,” she was already living in that world. Reality simply reflected that thought back to her.

It’s okay if you still have feelings you can’t forgive. It’s okay if the confusion doesn’t completely fade away.

All you need to do is decide: “Who do I want to be?”

M shares her full story in detail in this video. Please take a look ❤

📺 When She Let Go of Her Ex Who She Didn’t Trust and Became “Deeply Adored by Someone I Love,” Her Ideal Partner List Partner Appeared!